Documents Indicating Administration Doubts On Niger Intelligence Are Themselves Debunked, National Staff (ST Tribune), Wed, Jul 23 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT)
WASHINGTON -- Documents provided to reporters and appearing to show administration foreknowledge of the suspect nature of the Nigerien documents used to bolster the British and Pentagon claims regarding Iraq's nuclear weapons program have themselves been debunked as clumsy forgeries.
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Upgrade To White House E-Mail System Expected To Screen Decision Makers, Ease Follow-on Prosecution, National Staff (ST Tribune), Mon, Jul 21 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT)
WASHINGTON DC -- Under a system deployed on the White House Web site for the first time last week, those who want to send a message to President Bush must now fill out a form requesting detailed personal information as well as complete a cumbersome e-mail confirmation process before the intended message can be finally transmitted.
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Vapid Ben Affleck & J.Lo Romance Sets Public To Chattering About the Dead People, Arts Staff (ST Tribune), Wed, Jul 14 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT)
LOS ANGELES -- Experts are explaining renewed interest in the late political scion John F. Kennedy, Jr. and his breathing impaired wife, Carolyn Bissett Kennedy, by pointing to the current crop of what the experts refer to as 'utter crap' celebrities.
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Administration Declares End To Major Combat Operations In N. Korea, World Staff (ST Tribune), Mon, Jul 14 2003 Posted: 09:05 EST (1405 GMT)
WASHINGTON DC -- There were no aircraft carriers or fighter bombers on hand, but claiming it had met most if not all of its initial strategic goals, the Bush administration announced an end to major combat operations in North Korea this morning.
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Air Force Academy To Begin Veiling Female Cadets, National Staff (ST Tribune), Mon, Jul 14 2003 Posted: 08:30 EST (1330 GMT)
BOULDER CO -- Saying that "we cannot allow the otherwise first rate lady cadets to distract the 'real students'" an Air Force panel convened to address sexual harrassment at the Academy announced its new policy late Friday. The veiled uniforms are expected debut in September
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Bush Expected To Seek Key Role In Apocalypse , National Staff (ST Tribune), Mon, Jul 07 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT),
WASHINGTON DC -- In Positioning Himself For A Second Term Run, Aides Indicate George W. Bush Has Begun A Quiet Campaign For An Even Higher Office
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Karzai Regains Control Over Reserved Parking Spot, World Staff (ST Tribune), Sun, Jul 6 2003 Posted: 11:38 EST (1638 GMT)
KABUL -- Following a pitched battle, Afghanistan's U.S. backed Prime Minister Hamid Karzai reclaimed his parking spot from what the government is describing as latent "Taliban" or possibly "Al Qaeda" elements.
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Bloomberg Proposes Ban on Alcohol Service in NYC Bars and Restaurants, National Staff (ST Tribune), Thur, Jun 26 2003 Posted: 10:02 EST (1502 GMT)
NEW YORK -- Saying that "nothing makes you want a cigarette more than a stiff drink" New York's nanny Mayor, Michael Bloomberg has proposed regulations banning the sale of alcohol in city establishments.
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Man Unfazed To Discover Downloaded Britney Spears Nudes Are Faked , Arts Staff (ST Tribune), Fri, Jun 18 2003 Posted: 13:28 EST (1828 GMT),
SPRINGFIELD -- Saying "[t]he dude did a pretty good job with Photoshop" and that the "body model is still pretty hot", local man Jeff Carol denied that he was even a little bit disappointed last Tuesday when he found his entire cache of "Britney Spears" nudes on a celebrity site clearly marked as known fakes.
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Cremaster: Sucking the fun right back out of post-modernism since 1995 , Arts Staff (ST Tribune), Fri, Jun 13 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT),
NEW YORK -- At least since early 1990 Post-modernism has meant profanity laced genre films and retro-flavored softcore pornography. But that apparently wasn't painful enough for killjoy graduate school refugee Matthew Barney
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Ashcroft Proposes New Alert Color, Undrapes Statue In Desperate Bid For Attention , World Staff (ST Tribune), Fri, Jun 13 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT),
WASHINGTON DC -- Feeling neglected by a Pentagon centered press, Attorney General John Aschroft announced a new alert color today (Bisque) which is expected to fill a previously unremarked gap between yellow and orange.
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Survey Says 44% of Americans Prefer Not To Think , National Staff (ST Tribune), Fri, Jun 13 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT),
WASHINGTON DC -- A recent New York Times Survey finding 44% of likely voters "strongly support" the Bush administration is being interpreted by at least one expert as a sign that Americans would rather "just put their hand over their ears and hum real loud until their problems go away".
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Unrepentant 60s Era Globe Continues to Show Zimbawe as Rhodesia, Beijing As Peking, World Staff (ST Tribune), Thu, Jun 12 2003 Posted: 12:45 EDT (17:45 GMT)
WORLD DESK -- Our office's 1961 Rand McNalley WorldSphere® is a reactionary Anglophile with active dreams of empire and doesn't appear to care who knows it.
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Rumsfeld Mulls Syncing Policy With U.S., A.R. Pisarra (ST Tribune), Thu, Jun 12 2003 Posted: 10:29 EDT (15:29 GMT)
WASHINGTON DC -- Describing George W. Bush as a "close and trusted ally" Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld indicated today that the Defense Department would seek closer coordination with United States in a number of future foreign policy and military initiatives.
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Democratic Front Runners Appear To Form One Giant Candidate: Threaten To 'Smash Puny' Human Candidates, National Staff (ST Tribune), Thu, May 29 2003 Posted: 12:46 EST (1746 GMT)
CONCORD NH -- Described by witnesses as middle-aged, 'yearbook handsome', with really good hair and wearing what appeared to be the remnants of navy blue suit pants, a fifteen foot tall white male was spotted in McMurray's Big-n-Tall off I-93 near Manchester, NH late yesterday afternoon.
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Former Iraqi Information Minister In Bid For Fleischer Post , World Staff (ST Tribune), Fri, May 16 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT)
AMAN, JORDAN -- Following the recent announcement by White House Press Secretary Ari Fleischer that he will resign in July, former Iraqi Information Minister Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf announced he will seek the post
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Swedish Amazon Excels At Sport , Arts Staff (ST Tribune), Fri, May 14 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT),
ARTS DESK --
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Wheat Is Not Even A Color: Getting Back To The Primaries, , Wed, May 14 2003 Posted: 10:38 EST (1538 GMT)
OPINION -- In the most recent special survey undertaken by the Standard Times Tribune readers were asked to choose their favorite colour. As a long time proponent of the colour Blue I was excited for the chance to participate
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France to Become "Le Pays de la Liberté": Demands Royalty On "Freedom Fries" , World Staff (ST Tribune), Thu, Mar 12 2003 Posted: 10:02 EST (1502 GMT)
PARIS -- Declaring itself the ultimate Domaine Controllée, Le Pays de la Liberté (the PDL) has asserted marketing rights over products containing the common English words "Free", "Freedom" and "Liberty". Seeks WTO ruling on "Lite".
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